Pleasure and Pain

One of the strange things (wait, have I used that as a starting point previously? Hmmm, well, then this is simply today's strange thing... and I guess in these times of strange things that's probably acceptable!) about this pandemic and the lock-down that most of us are either in or will soon be in is the odd sensations. Sensations about things that you feel you want to do and should be doing but can't because you either cannot go and get what you need or there simply is not what you need available. But that you feel frustrated that you cannot get on and do this pressing thing, whatever it might be, because everything has changed!

Thing is, the thing that you wanted to do could have been done at any point in the preceding nn years but was not and yet now you have all this free time it suddenly seems important probably because you cannot do it rather than you really want to do it.

It's a bit like being physically constrained (except for those that do ot like being physically constrained) and wanting to be released so you can wander about a little bit more like a sheep munching on grass. If you grab a sheep and constrain it (for shearing rather than any other reason) then it will kick and struggle to get out of being constrained fearful that you're about to take a big chunk out of its neck with your tiny teeth! But let it go and it'll run about five metres, stop, check where you are and then start chewing grass again!

I guess we are a little more thoughtful about why we do not like being constrained but it might be pretty much the same thing. After all, once the constraints have been lifted and it is possible for you to do those things that it strikes you while being constrained that you would really really like to do but can't because you are being constrained then I'll bet once released you will not do them either. Instead, like that sheep, you'll run about five metres from the apartment, realise you are no longer constrained and the start munching on some grass, or pizza or burger or whatever you fancy.

Then suddenly, just as if nothing has happened, you'll return to doing whatever you were doing before being constrained and put the thing that you really wanted to do while being constrained back on a back burner until you deem it a useful use of your time... which will probably be when you are next tied down for some reason!

I had a similar experience when I was young and ended up in hospital and really really wanted to do something that I had not really considered important in my life before I was stuck in hospital but while I was in hospital I deemed it important that once I could, I would. Sure enough when I got out of hospital and was in a sufficiently able condition to do so, I did follow up on what seemed so important but it did not stick, it was kind of mentally ticked off and then put back in the box marked things I should do but am too damn lazy to actually do. Such is life.

I am also reminded of various studies that show our brains only retain the latter parts of bad or painful experiences. For instance, child birth, the whole process of child birth can (I am reliably informed) be extremely painful with pain at times that seems never ending and causing many mothers to wish they had never engaged in sex in the first place and that this whole process was wayyyy too much pain for the whole gift of life thing and then it is over. But when looking back these mothers that, during the process swore 'never again' now only recollect a small amount of pain at the end and a wonderful new baby which was so much better than perceived small amount of pain they had to endure and promptly a large number do it all over again!

There have also been studies that took far shorter periods where subjects endured a little pain and a little pleasure and even if the amount of pain exceeded the amount of pleasure the timing of which was felt at which point was critical to the experience memories. In short, if the pleasurable part of the experiment was at the end of the experiment then that was recollected over and above the more enduring displeasure.

So it will be with this lock down... I hope... in the meantime I will continue writing nonsense for fun!